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Pudding Is Delicious

by Illbotz

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  • Streaming + Download

    From the people who brought you "Nothing Rhymes With Engine," "Illbotz 2: Electric Boogaloo," "Ringtones For Rotary Phones," "Paul's Boutique," "Fear Of A Black Planet," "Let It Be," "Let It Be...Naked," "Shaq Fu: Da Return," "Michael McDonald's Crunk Classics," "Tag Team's Greatest Hit," and "The Clueless Soundtrack," Illbotz present their latest and greatest album: "Pudding Is Delicious!" This album will make you laugh, cry, smile, frown, gasp, fart, sneeze, snart, shart, question your sexuality, call in to work, buy a hula hoop, sign up for hula hoop lessons, forget to go to hula hoop lessons, believe in dinosaurs, and want eggrolls and pudding at the same time! It's that good! It also has some songs and skits and stuff on it.

    On February 1, 2011, Illbotz released their latest and greatest album, "Pudding Is Delicious!" It was recorded with Poe Mack in Salem, VA and was fueled creatively by massive amounts of pudding, PBR, and hours of listening to Kris Kross and The Smiths. It includes "Give A Little Love," which was recently featured on the nerdcore compilation, "Nerdcore Now Volume 1." It also includes such fine hip hop gems as "Your iPod Sucks," "Throw Me An Eggroll," and "The Power Glove (Lucas' Theme)." Illbotz also had a lot of fun singing on this record. There's a gospel song entitled "Jesus Gave Me Water (But What I Wanted Was A PBR)" as well as a Beach Boys style song called "Zombie Girl," an acoustic song and a punk song. They're extremely talented and good at everything they do so they do stuff. This album will prove to go down in history as one of the greatest things ever to exist ever. It will one day become just important as the light bulb, the cotton gin, or the slap bracelet.
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1.
Fair eastside Fair eastside, Fair eastside By thy side we'll stand and always praise thy name Praise thy name, praise thy name To heaven, yeah So cheer for dear old eastside high lead on to victory
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Illbotz Rock The Spot And Go Crazy Oh, it feels so good It feels so good to be back in this muthafucka 4 truth Aww shit, this is gonna be better than Cool as Ice 2, Short Circuit 3, Flintstones meet the Silver Hawks, Centurions…all that shit, all that, all that, all that! Come on, come on! Chorus: Illbotz rock the spot and go crazy! Illbotz rock the spot and go CRAZY! (Crowd) Stevie D Verse: Comin’ out the Darkness like Justin Hawkins Rockin’ wit a little back talkin’, squawkin’ Shockin’ like findin’ out that Prince is a guy And Caw Aaw is what it sounds like when doves cry Black ya eye, jack ya for ya raspberry vinaigrette Smash fax machines like I was workin’ for Initech I RIP I FLIP I SHOCK I ROCK I can’t afford Adidas so I rock mad Crocs Illbotz muthafucka – still the best that ever did it Drop the shittiest shit ever – Can you smell it? Cause I shitted Admit it – Stevie D, Perm, and Samson Keep the party gigglin’ like Ernest when he’s campin’ Now throw ya hands up in the muthafuckin’ sky Holla 3.14! You know that shit’s pi! Fly like an ostrich Hold ya grandma hostage Paid $3 for some cheesy fries cause that’s how much they cost bitch! Chorus: Y’all muthafuckas thought I was gonna leave out Big Perm? He’s the Grimace cookie of this shit. Illbotz is here forever muthafuckas! Big Perm Verse: Mama say mama saw mama cusaw My mama say I rap too hard but mama I can’t stop To the tick tock and you don’t stop, hit it They say I ain’t no rapper cause I don’t wear a fitted Ha ha ha, had to find that silly Ripped jeans, overweight, girls still find me pretty Ain’t it a pity, skinny guys envy Nigga you know the game and yo bitch chose me I’m the reason yo girlfriend loses so much sleep Plus ya girl is easy like taking tests with cheat sheets When will ya learn, you’ll never beat me bitch I got the supercalifragilousanexpialidopeshit! Shake ya belly meat, Perm shake ya belly meat Shake ya belly meat, Sam shake ya belly meat Shake ya belly meat, me…I got, I got no fuckin’ belly meat Chorus: Ya know what I’m sayin. You know you can buy the right legos and make a lego spaceship. You know what I’m sayin. That’s not the problem. You can go to Kay Bee and get the Legos. But if you don’t have the red lego spaceman to go with the lego spaceship, it just doesn’t work. It’s a fuckin’ travesty. It’s just fuckin’ stupid. Chorus:
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Throw Me An Eggroll Chorus: D: Hey yo waddup big sperm P: Chillin’ yo, just picked up some takeout from the Double Dragon D: Oh word son, what’cha got? Some lo mein, some pu pu platter? P: Nah, I got some of this new double dragon moo goo gai... D: Throw Me An Eggroll! Aww shit, you done tripped and fell all up in some niceness I’m priceless, like Pee Wee Herman dolls, I make a nice gift I’m iceless, never bought a rock that costed more than 3 dollas All the baseheads in the house shout “holla” Oochie Walla Walla, Oochie, Walla, Coochie I Bang At night I’m drinkin' Dayquil and by day, I drink the night train Insane just like a deaf man with earphones on You Muthafuckas slip and feel my wrath like Khan I’m the illest muthafuckin’ rhyme sayer on the planet Some compare me to a God so they be screamin' “Steviedammit” Understand it, I’m the one who got ya granny’s panties moist Your favorite rappas, favorite rappas, favorite rappas favorite choice Ahead of my time like Tron or any Air Supply record Makin’ all the self conscious ugly girls get nekked Ho just like Whodini, easy like e, so check the simile Big time like Heavy D, diddily diddily diddily diddily Sillily rhymin’ to the best of my ability Smooth as milk, rockin’ the mic so top billingley Mc’s is killin’ me but not like Chi-Ali Step on my roos and I will take that shit personally Chorus: D: Whoo! What’d ya think of dat verse right dare boy?? P: Not too shitty yo!! D: Off the dome too son! No pen no pad. What the fuck’s a pen? P: Ahh…You Jay-z’ed it. I don’t know. I could’ve swore I... D: Throw Me An Eggroll! D back in the muthafuckin' cut once mo I am the man which I know so you can call me Sloppy Joe Everybody tunin' into me like I was a G chord Makin’ girlies shake they tails til they fall off like Eeyore (Oh pooh!) A wee more greater, Gleam the cube like Christian Slater Not a gimmick, the most original thing since Darth Tater Steal ya pack of now and laters and I fuck up ya fun dip Crazy tasty red sugar on a candy stick Got more game than McDonald’s Monopoly You might get an Egg McMuffin but you’ll never get property I fuck up a rappas’ knuckles, make em call me uncle Round 2, yellin Jenga as your blocks straight tumble Yo I’m the illest of the illest of ill How can one rappa be so trill? See more butts than Gene Simmons, I got 5 midget women That wanna lay me like crazy. That’s 2 ½ grown ladies! Chorus: P: Nice verse brusk! D: Thanks yo. Hey yo did you hear about the economic slump that Uganda’s goin’ through right now? P: Yea I did! I just think they just need to get their resources together and focus on their exports... D: Throw Me An Eggroll! Da man wit the tan that’s little to none I'm Stevie D, I feel so special like I just scored a hole in one At Putt Putt then blessed wit a nice orange ball Speakin’ of balls, I got the biggest fuckin’ balls of them all! (Bam!) Who shot ya? (Biggie) nope, nope it was me I’m blastin’ every single rapper til there remains only three Yo! Me and Kool Moe Dee, and that one guy from M.O.P. Who’ll probably end up killin’ me and Kool Moe Dee (Brownsville!) Rappas comin’ at me wit they played out styles They need to let em rest in peace with that guy who wrestled crocodiles (Krikey!) Excuse my chillness, cause I know that shit was cold Let me quit and bust some shit like I was 5 years old I like cookies and milk (x3) I summon you Pikachu! (Gyeah!) Chorus: D: Alright I’m done P: I give that song like 3 mics D: That shit was a classic - 5 mics Main Source - Breaking Atoms shit P: More like Kris Kross - Young Rich and Dangerous D: Fuck you P: Fuck you D: I killed it P: You ruined it! D: I shouldn’t’ve even got you on this track P: I don’t give a fuck. I didn’t wanna come down here to Poe’s closet anyway. I just wanted to go to Hardees and get that new muthafuckin’ bologna biscuit… D: Throw me an eggroll, throw me an eggroll, throw me a muthafuckin’ eggroll P: I-ight, here, ya go…Damn. Beef with broccoli, general tsao’s for me Then ya add the egg roll and my gut is swole
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Dinosaur, Dinosaur Yo, Stevie D back from out the clothes hamper! What’d you think I was gonna disappear like all those other comic rappers? Get a reality show on VH1 or some shit? Celebrity fit club or some shit. Shit yo, I’m skinny as a muthafucka! Still the biggest in this game though yo. Still the best! I’m a fuckin’ dinosaur in this bitch yo! People scared of me yo. I eat rappers for dinner, lunch, breakfast, brunch, brinner, leakfast, dunch. Chorus: Step on back bitches, better get on back bitches I’m on the road up to the riches – hand the game on over – nicely It’s Stevie the D bitches, sweet like a sweet tea bitches Straight from the Mickey D’s bitches – How I drink dat? – icey Still the illest bot bitches, suck on a tater tot bitches Hot like my chicken sandwiches – How I like dem? – spicy Still the best that ever did it, still the biggest, don’t forget it Better scream when I’m comin’ like “Dinosaur, Dinosaur!” Oh snap, look who’s bounced back up on the track Big ups to Poe Mack - another dude who’s fat and black (Hey, what the fuck you say bro?) Hey yo, I just said that I only weigh a buck fitty but yo fitty of that is sack Yea! And that’s nuts baby – big swollen nuts! I sell my rhymes mad crazy cheap just like a little bag of Utz Oh! Don’t give a fuck Ned Flanders don’t give a heck My little homie Baby Boo he took a pencil in his neck Chorus: Hey yo I probably won’t make it to 122 I’ll probably die from fuckin’ chickens that give me the bird flu Beat rappas wit candlesticks like Colonel Mustard in Clue Beat a cobbler for the Beatles, got an old brown shoe Similar to John Lennon but hate peace and Asian women I’m a writer like Mark Twain. (Hey yo, his name was Samuel Clemens!) Word! Stevie D, Illbotz, and Trunoke If you see me up on Facebook, gimme a poke! Ok! Chorus: Yea muthafuckas, it’s a Dinosaur, Dinosaur! Damn, father suckers it’s a Dinosaur, Dinosaur! Damn, rubber truckers, it’s a Dinosaur, Dinosaur! Ahead of my time, on my grind since 89 Got the mic givin’ me goosebumps like R.L. Stine On my grind like my teeth when I had TMJ If you like it, then put a ring on it Beyonce I don’t kid or play – don’t wear belts – my pants are fallin’ Play tetherball and throw spitballs, therefore I’m ballin’ Too hot to handle, too cold to boast ghosts Def like Mos, and tell corny jokes like game show hosts Stevie DVD like Chuck D bringin’ the noise in Got skanks competin’ for me like that old dude from Poison Bret Michaels, Ricky Rocket, CC, Bobby Dall I know you bitches be impressed – I knew em all! Ha! Dinosaur! It’s just a metaphor – Don’t know if it works But I eat rappers for dinner and ice scream snickers for dessert – Word! Chorus:
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Bot Life 04:14
Bot Life Yea, I double L Livin’ that fresh life, you know what I’m sayin’ (Word) Fly ass whips (Dig), cars too (Feelin’ it) Betamaxes in the headrest (I ain’t got one of those) Expensive houses, teepees, wigwams (Uh-huh, uh-huh) And puttin’ our grandmas in the freshest nursing homes (Hardees every day!!!) Chorus: Payin’ child support to girls we got prego – yo this is bot life Makin’ meth labs out of legos – yo this is bot life Forever eatin’ seafood alfredo – yo this is bot life The hot life – shit right – yo this is bot life Everyday’s a stroll in the park – yo this is bot life Fresh jheri curl wit a part – yo this is bot life Forever Superman, never Clark – yo this is bot life The hot life – fuck right – yo this is bot life Perm Verse: I’ma purify myself in Lake Minatonka Buy 1000 ill slap bracelets because I wanta I’m feelin great, I’m feelin tall as a tree And if you think you’re taller than me nigga, pff…leaves I’ma do what I want and ain’t nobody gonna stop me I’ma eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner all at Hardees I’ma sit down at home and watch porno all day Who the hell am I kiddin? I was gonna do that anyway So back the fuck up, and sit the fuck down And shut the fuck up, cause I run this fuckin’ up Well not really but in my mind I do Because I stay wylin’ out sniffin’ all kindsa glue So peep the ballistics and pass the chex mix I know that’s your liquor drink but can I please have a sip This bot life can get so damn hectic My perm is big name dyslexic Chorus: Stevie D Verse: I pull up in my ragtop Delorian Flux capacitor in the back, let’s visit 1984 again Got two heaters – one to warm up my toesees One kept up under the seat so I can blast on my foesees That’s how I rollsees, pocket full of gwaps Got all my Jewish friends stuntin’ wit some pockets full of tops Fuck the cops, they in my pocket like nickels Bought the fuckin’ FDA and made ‘em outlaw pickles From the time I wake up til the time I sleep, I make it ra-ai-ai-ai-ain And sniff up lots of ca-ai-ai-ai-ain, while watchin’ Major Pay-ay-ay-ay-ane I’m so insa-a-a-a-ane, givin’ more gifts than Santa Spendin’ money like rich parents do on Hanna Montana In Atlanta, at the clubs, throwin’ saving bonds at scrippers Got our own booth at Denny’s - we 25% tippers! Pussycat Dolls fed me and Perm like 80 grapes Haterz get mad cause I got me some bathin’ apes Chorus: Stevie D Verse 2: How many bitches wanna get this knot All these busta bitches screamin’ Aww damn that’s a knot I got a knot yo, a big knot yo Gonna buy some fuckin’ nachos wit my knot yo Just watch yo, got the biggest damn knot in the LBC It’s the I double L B-O-T-Z We got fat knots You got no knots Wish you had two knots But you do not Ha ha ha Got so many knots, much more knots than you I’ll buy up Disneyland and Disneyworld and Euro Disney too That cost mad knots Not sure how many knots But it’s a lotta knots At least six knots Tik Tok is a song by Ke$ha and you know that it’s true I got more knots than ya fuckin’ Roos shoelaces do We got plus knots You got nil knots Yo and we’re the Illbotz We…we, we got knots Chorus:
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Your iPod Sucks My I Pod Makes me a musical God I got lists that’ll make ya stand up and applaud My ipod’s fresher than the freshest salad - Yes Sir Like an Olive Garden salad - cause there ain’t none fresher My ipod - straight Jay-Z blueprint Yo ipod - Jay-Z blueprint edited My ipod - Black Flag and Slayer Yo ipod - Jason Mraz and John Mayer My ipod - Chess, Blue Note, and Stax Yo ipod - Creed, Trapt, and Nickelback My iPod - Elliott Smith and Patti Smith Yo iPod - Aerosmith My ipod got a million gigabytes Of the illest damn shit ya ever heard in ya life My taste is exquisite, yo taste is yuck My ipod rules, your ipod sucks You rollin’ with 3 gigs, I got a thousandy hundred I got Tom Waits songs that he ain’t even done yet You a pophead common ass product of the system I’m indie as fuck! I even got a beard! Listen! I dis ya group if you got more than 25 fans I bet you don’t know shit about the following bands What you know about? Panda Milk Situation What you know about? Card Catalog Nation What you know about? Tank Tops In Traffic What you know about? The Orlando Bloom Magic My ipod got 30,000 and some Yo - Of the freshest butter tracks that make you feel like a crumb Wit yo ipod – cause your taste is yuck My ipod rules, your ipod sucks If your ipod was an alien, I’d get that shit deported My cell phone rang, it was your ipod, I ignored it If your ipod was on facebook, I’d deny it's friend request And if your ipod wants to dance, I’d punch in it’s bitch neck My ipod - can benchpress 350 Yo ipod - is a pansy/ sissy My ipod - is so raven Yo ipod - not so very raven My ipod make ya say oh snap! How the hell you get so much flava on that? My taste is exquisite, yo taste is yuck My ipod rules, your ipod sucks I’m frontin’ on ya ipod cause ya ipod is wack son You got “when doves cry” and put it under Michael Jackson My ipod - the clash, your ipod - johnny cash (well, that’s pretty good actually - I like johnny cash - he’s good) My ipod - 73 Stevie Wonder Yo ipod - 83 Stevie Wonder Yo! I hate your ipod like Big Perm hates hair And if your ipod was pregnant, then I’d push it down the stairs I got covers for every album and everything spelled correct My ipod’s like an ipod - yours is like a cassette Ya got Death Cab for Cutie but you don’t have "Plans" Yo and you don’t know shit about the following bands What you know about? The Beatrix Pottery What you know about? Unclogged Arteries What you know about? The Fuck Shit Bitches What you know about? Yum! Pudding Is Delicious My ipod make ya say aww damn! How you got so much flava in the palm of your hand? Cuz my taste is exquisite, yo taste is yuck My ipod rules, your ipod sucks My ipod My ipod My ipod - filled with Illbotz tunes Yo ipod is a zune!
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Babybot 03:24
Babybot Yea. I'm a take a little time out here and get real sexy for a second so get comfortable Oh-ho Baby! Babybot Babybot You make me crazy! Babybot Babybot You often lay me! Babybot Babybot Whoa-ho Baby! Babybot Babybot Whoa-ho Honey! Babybot Babybot You’re so damn money! Babybot Babybot You love this dummy! Babybot Babybot Whoa-ho Honey! Babybot Babybot Yo, I remember when I first met ya And now I get ta – be wit you forever like Bill Cosby and a sweater Perfect together like some deodorant and armpits From the time I’m dirty thirty til' I’m a hundred and some shit You got me feelin’ like these feelins are the feelins to be felt Yo! Word to the girl from Elf but I’m not sittin’ on the shelf Like my fingers in the socket cause I’m constantly glowin’ And yo! You can call me Daddy like a Sylvia Plath poem I’m knowin’ you plus me equals us like calculus Like my little golden compass – gonna lead me to the dust Make me shine like a crocodile smile wit a grill on it Brighter than a white tee wit a kool aid spill on it You da bomb like some old 90’s Kris Kross slang Me without you couldn’t exist like Twilight vampire fangs My Lovebug Starski - sit down and have a sip or two Prepare to have ya mind blown as I sing some sexy shit for you Oh-ho baby! Babybot Babybot Born in the 80’s! Babybot Babybot You are a lady! Babybot Babybot! Whoa-ho baby! Babybot Babybot Whoa-ho sweetie! Babybot Babybot You say you need me! Babybot Babybot You eat yo Wheaties! Babybot Babybot Whoa-ho sweetie! Babybot Babybot You’re more hot than a boilin pot sittin on a lava rock Up inside a ghetto block surrounded by gun shots Hotter than a thousand suns on the grill with texas pete It’s neat that I think you’re swell and it’s swell that I think you’re neat Yo! Our love is correct like Pauly D’s hair on Jersey shore And you always give me kisses even when my mouth got sores Hey yo! Four Minus Two – That’s two, that’s me and you Got me singin’ like the wonders when you do that thing you do And I love you like white trash loves walmart and layaway More than emo kids love Jared Leto and razor blades I’m buggin’ like roaches yo when you give me ya hand to hold Kisses more delicious than a tight spicy salmon roll Ya hold me and rub my back after I cry from watchin’ Avatar Don’t splash water on the floor cause that is what the cat is for My Lovebug Starski – sit down and have a sip or two Prepare to have ya mind blown as I sing some sexy shit for you Oh-ho Baby! Babybot Babybot You are a Davies! Babybot Babybot You don’t have scabies! Babybot Babybot Whoa-ho Baby! Babybot Babybot Whoa-ho Darling! Babybot Babybot You are so charming! Babybot Babybot You got a garden! Babybot Babybot Oh-ho Darling! Babybot Babybot (Applause) Thank you! Thank you very much ladies and gentlemen! Thank you, thank you You coulda been anywhere in the world tonight but you're here wit me I appreciate that, yea No, I learned to sing all on my own – no classical training You know what I'm sayin – I just listen to a lot of Biz Markie, that's all, you know what I'm sayin Thank you, thank you Tip your bartenders now – Don’t feed the dinosaur – haha – good night!
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Zombie Girl 02:26
Zombie Girl This is another story about girls For a girl who doesn't give brains but eats them instead is a zombie So say Illbotz Sing it fellas Little zombie, little one Your mouth’s full of intestines Do you love me? Do you zombie girl? Zombie girl, my little zombie girl I eat biscuits, you eat brains Your GWAR shirt has real blood stains Do you love me? Do you zombie girl? Zombie girl, zombie girl I can see our beautiful undead future Bloodsoaked towels - hers and his I could say my heart is in your hands, cause the truth is that it is, oh gee wiz Now I’m dying, turning blue I tell you that I love you and you say “Uhhhh” Do you love me? Do you zombie girl? Zombie girl, my little zombie girl Well Girl, zombie girl, my little zombie girl Well Girl, zombie girl, my little zombie girl Well Girl, zombie girl, my little zombie girl
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The Power Glove (Lucas' Theme) Yo this right here is Lucas, you know what I'm sayin' King of the NES so fresh, you know I'd never settle for anything less Best of this Nintendo shit, you know what I'm sayin' And this right here is my story - yea - so check it! Yo, my name is Lucas, I'm the don of this shit Ain't a punk fucker out there that I ain't whipped At any video game -- I stun bitches wit my radness Only kid on my block to ever beat Marble Madness Been the best at NES yo since the age of 11 You wanna battle, pick a game, I got all 97 It ain't no secret how I freak it when I beat these scrubs Take a look at my right hand, man I'm in love with the power glove Chorus: Yea I got the power glove This is dedicated to my best friend the power glove Yea It's so bad I love The power glove Now everybody sing, everybody sing, come on: Lodi Da Da Da Da Da Wodi Odo Dodi Do Lodi Da Da Da Da Da Wodi O Wodi Odi Odi O Yeah! Now one day when I was chillin' yo, these kids came over braggin' How they boy got a measly 50 thou on Double Dragon Said he was hittin' LA for Video Armageddon Tryin' to get me nervous -- Yo, you'll never catch Lucas sweatin'! They was callin' him the Wizard -- more like time waster I reached into my games and pulled out Rad Racer Pulled out the power glove -- showed him skills he never had I said "I love the power glove! It's so bad!" I said I'm winnin' that fuckin' competition man, I'll warn ya Only thing the kid could say back was "California" His girl was lookin' hot, I'd put my power glove on that Looks like she'd rise up with fists though, so I'll move back I'll catch a nap, eat a snack, play some TMNT Beat Mecha-Turtle's ass at the end of level three It's just me, it's Lucas, fly like a dove Take that, move back, catch a heart attack, bitch I got the power glove! Chorus: So The Wizard disappeared and never bothered to holla I took my ass to LA to win that 50 thousand dollas At Video Armageddon -- all them fools was gettin' wrecked Had my Vision Street Wear on and I was lookin' correct In full effect, and my game-playin' couldn't be dissed Sat back and waited for the announcer to read the three finalists It was me Lucas, of course, and this pig-tailed miss And then the third contestant -- what the fuck is this? It was that fuckin' wizard kid aka Jimmy Woods He can't say but one word, yo how the fuck is he so good! A retard, an ugly nerdy lookin' bitch and me The crowd gasped when we had to play Super Mario 3 I was smokin' them fools til Jimmy found a warp zone Then of course the game was his and me, the king, was dethroned The crowd went nuts and gave that little retard hugs But it would've been me gettin' the love if I'd got the power glove! Chorus: Yea I got the power glove This is dedicated to my main man the power glove What is it a blizzard? Not at all It's the power glove Yea Now everybody sing, everybody sing, come on: Lodi Da Da Da Da Da Wodi Odo Dodi Do Lodi Da Da Da Da Da Wodi O Wodi Odi Odi O Yeah! Yea I love the fuckin' power glove It's so bad I love this song about the power glove It's so bad Not bad meanin' bad but bad meanin good You know what I'm sayin' Yea This is Lucas Original Nintendo bad boy Signin' off Fuckers!
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Can I Put It On A Sandwich? Hey yo Perm check out that girl with the big FAT tail That butt is a butt Yea son, I wanna put that muthafucka on a sandwich Chorus: Girl your booty’s butter - can I put it on a sandwich? Girl that ass is jelly - better put it on a sandwich Girl that butt is meaty - can I put it on a sandwich? Girl that rump is yummy - better put it on a sandwich Stevie D Verse: I see your seein’ what I’m seein’ and I’m seein’ and believin’ that everyone with eyes are seein’ need to be seein’ ya butt Looks like that ass was finely crafted by an angel and he presented it to the Lord yo and the lord was like what? Booty so plump, I bet it don’t take dumps It drops pop tarts Brown Sugar Cinnamon Pop tarts! I like the way ya milk shakes and never curdles Like it was painted by Leonardo or them other Ninja Turtles Ain’t got no time to be stressin’, I’m just addressin’ the question, hope you say yes and can I please get some dressing with that rump? And can I get you to my mommas, I’d be honored if you join me in the bedroom but I get the top bunk! Yo! Don’t fake the funk girl you’re sittin’ on a goldmine Like you a half a game of golf cause you the whole 9 I think it’s time that you break me off a piece of that buttcake Brown Sugar Cinnamon buttcake! That ass is so delicious So hot and cool and vicious Like Salt N’ Pepa – those are 2 spices that are delicious If you would be my missis I’d even do the dishes After you break me off with so many sandwiches! Chorus: Big Perm Verse: B-b-b-baby your booty’s bangin’, I mean it for real shorty We can get it in, so let me in for some hot coffee Ya lookin’ like you’re smugglin’ bean bag chairs Like you’re no stranger to a Krispy Kreme, hell (yea) So let me get down, down to the sitch If there’s a market for booty blubber, then baby you’d be rich The way it’s jigglin’ make Mr. Huxtable proud And when you’re jumpin’ up and down, it always sounds like a crowd If ya ass was a wrestler, it’d be Butt Butt Bigalo So drop ya butt low and clean the flo like it’s Mop and Glo Ya hiney’s so big that it reminds me of a jeep And you’re the opposite of Wendy’s cause I know where’s the beef So let me a get a handful of that rumproast baby I know it’s gonna be good but ya gotta work for that gravy Girl your ass is fat, can I put it on a sandwich? It’s lookin’ little sloppy, can I put it on a Manwich? Trust me baby, I’m a booty connoisseur Just like a bistro, you’re the booty du jour I’m sorry, didn’t mean to talk so high class So let me dumb it down for ya, gimme some of that ass (Yeah!) Chorus: Back it up, let me put it on some wonder bread (x3) I guess that’s why they call it wonder bread Chorus: Hey yo Perm (Yo!) I think we might've just ripped off "Baby Got Back" (I think you're right) Oh well, fuck it, it's hot (Biscuits!)
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Stupid Lazy Eye (Get Off The Couch) Lazy eye, get off the couch! (x3) We work for money in this house Lazy eye, get off the couch! (x3) I’ll smack you in your retina mouth! All you ever do is sit around and drink Visine You always steal my monocle, now give it back to me Get up and get a job at Lens Crafters or Ray Ban Stupid lazy eye, get off the couch now while you can!
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Marshall (The Friendliest Punk in Town) Well I got a friend named Marshall and he screams and yells real loud Yea, He is Marshall, he is Marshall But he never spits and hocks disgusting loogies on the crowd No, He is Marshall, he is Marshall He’ll kick you in the face but he’ll never kick you in the back No, He is Marshall, he is Marshall He’ll borrow your GBH records but he won’t sell them for crack No, He is Marshall, he is Marshall If you fall down in the pit, he’ll pick you up He’ll support your band even if they suck He likes the Misfits but he also likes Bread He’s got a lotta curly hairs up on his head He’s Marshall, Marshall – The Friendliest Punk in Town (x2) Well, he's got a body that's completely covered in tattoos Yea, He is Marshall, he is Marshall Only bad thing is they're all tattoos from Blues Clues Yea, He is Marshall, he is Marshall Before he robs a liquor store, he’ll ask you if you need anything He is Marshall, he is Marshall And once a week he even takes a bath with Irish Spring Yea, He is Marshall, he is Marshall If you fall down in the pit, he’ll pick you up He’ll support your band even if they suck He likes the Misfits but he also likes Bread He’s got a lotta curly hairs up on his head He’s Marshall, Marshall – The Friendliest Punk in Town (x2) Oi! Oi! Oi! Yea Rock on
18.
19.
Give A Little Love Yea, haha, you know what I’m sayin’ It’s just one of them days, you know what I’m sayin’ One of them nice sunny days You just wanna go to the park You know what I’m sayin’, lick on an ice cream cone or sumpin’ Snack on a Mr. Goodbar You know, real nice day Stevie D Verse: Wake up and the sun is in my face like BLOOW! Wanna give the world some lovin’ and I think I’ll do it NOW! It’s such a beautiful day, I think I’ll jump up on the roundabout Spin as fast as I can in circles til I puke my frankenberries out Give a shout out to my people in Pop’s ice cream shop See some preppies in the corner wearin’ Birkenstocks – Yo Brobocops! Greet everyone I see wit a Wuddup homie, good to see ya How’s ya doodle hangin’? Oh yo, sorry bout ya diarrhea Doodywater, that’s disgustin! Your colon’s bustin’? Call an ambulance, tell ‘em pick up ya people and change ya poopy pants Oh! there my Botz be, Perm, Sam, & Chachi Scott Baio – what the fuck you doin’ hangin’ wit deez gaybos? You were on Happy Days, I was on meth – Coinkydink! Gimme a hug, Perm’s got drugs, Moe’s got the drinky drinks! I’m so happy I could fuck the sky! Like Da Da Da Da Da Da Da Da Da Da Da Da Chorus: Have a little, Let a little, kiss a cripple, give a little love – (Oh! Come on now) Rub a little, hug a little, tweak a nipple, get a little love – (Gyeah! Come on now) Bear a little, care a little, share a pickle, give a little love – (Oh! Damn right!) Wiggle wiggle, giggle shmiggle, peanut brittle, get a little - Da da da da da da da da da da da Big Perm Verse: Hey what’s happenin’? I hope ya feel the way I do Like ya got right out of school, like ya just freed Haru No one’s gonna get me down, No one’s gonna make me frown Everyone I walk past give me high 5’s and daps Give me Pabst when I wanna drink it, Camel Filters when I’m feenin’ Fresh cubes when I’m gleamin’, hookers when I’m Charlie Sheenin’ Who loves Orange Soda? I do like Kel and Keenan Who hates behavin’ good? I do like imps and demons Come one, come all, get like me and be happy Get loose, don’t act like your energy is backseat Hark! Who goes there? It’s Perm and I’m feelin’ great Just like ya easy like goin’ downhill on roller skates Found a genie lamp, rubbed it hard as I could Now there’s trees in the hood cause I wish them niggas wood So what’cha gonna do when the 5 roll by Like da da da da da da da da da da Chorus: (x2) Chorus into ridiculousness:
20.
Jesus Gave Me Water (But What I Wanted Was A PBR) Jesus Gave Me Water (x3) But what I wanted was a PBR Jesus Gave Me Water (x3) But it was not PBR Well Jesus came down from Galilee, saw me chillin’ wit a dry ass throat He said “Stevie D – tell me how do you be?” I said “I’m chillin’ wit a dry ass throat” Well, he looked at me with a holy kinda scowl and then he told me this He said “I’ll give you some water and I know that’s not your order but PBR tastes like piss” I said 'scuse me Chorus: Well Jesus looked at me and he told me “yo only lepers drink PBR” I said, “well call me a leper. I don’t jooks wit Dr. Pepper or no moonshine from a jar” He said “I guess I’ll go on a beer run – can you throw me a ten – I’m a little short” I said “it’s PBR not caviar, yo here’s a five and bring me back some Newports” Yo! I said Chorus: Well I waited 40 days and for 40 nights for Jesus and my PBR I’m chillin’ in Jerusalem, the store is in Damascus – I ain't think that it was that far And then Perm called me, told me 39 days ago he ran into Jesus He said they drank some PBR and smoked a pack of Newports and then he turned his Zips into Adidas Oh! I said Chorus:
21.
22.
Stank Ass Rappas Sarah G Chorus: Big Perm & Stevie K-I-N-G’s Stank ass rappas all up in their cheese Whatever happened to the real MC’s Stevie step up please – (No doubt. Yo!) Gimme the mic, It’s my turn to be Illest MC, yo it’s absurd to me How you stank ass rappas ain’t heard of me Stevie D flush rappas like turds and pee Stay droppin’ shit since the 2G3 Rhymes stay sweeter than a Ju Ju Bee Get back, love rap like Spoonie Gee, Rappers hatin’, perpetratin’, tryin’ to be me Stevie DVD hip hop since Planet Rock Fuck ya ringtone pop, I’m a juggernaut Spittin’ hot fire, you can’t even make ya oven hot Shockin’ hip hop, listen close, hear the jaws drop Stay real while ya try to make the club hop Bigger than a sandwich in the hands of the Chubb Rock You make fun pop, goodie goodie gumdrop I wreck shop while you watch from the parkin’ lot Don’t stop Stevie D keep killin’ em Crowd too hype, got em pumped like a riddelin Can’t touch my lyrics with 10 fingers feelin’ em Rhymes, like a clutz with 10 cups, spillin’ em Shut it down when we got the crowds fillin’ in Suckas shakin’ from the fear that I instill in them Fuckin’ shake the buildin’ in, Noone’s fuckin’ iller than Illbotz rock, leave ya black eyed like will and them Sarah G Chorus: Big Perm & Stevie K-I-N-G’s Stank ass rappas all up in their cheese Whatever happened to the real MC’s Stevie step up please – (No doubt. Yo!) Gimme the stage, it’s my place to own Ain’t got a lighter than raise the phone Illbotz top guns, you in the danger zone Crew lookin’ smaller than a gang of gnomes Yo! Hands in the air like they made of foam Tght like a dress on Catherine Zeta Jones Can’t feel the love, you can hate alone Go moan, ain’t goin’ home, til the speakerbox blown Yo what you gonna do when we kill you loudly? Stick around, watch the crowd get rowdy Stevie D, bad boy like Mike Lowry Better in every measure, fresher, don’t doubt me Claim ya wild but ya style ain’t wowed me Can’t make it rain if the sky ain’t cloudy Oh boy howdy, Apple pan dowdy I’ll say it proudly, this game is about me I double L still fresh off the meat rack Called 5’s but ya can’t get ya seat back I’ve gone the distance to get here, your feet lack Ability to walk in my shoes, yo you need that Got the love of the real, fuck ya feedback Got about as much cred as some Creed crap Go eat sack, Poe Mack brought the beat back Hip Hop flows in my veins, bitch I bleed rap Sarah G Refrain: Stand And admit defeat Keep ya stank mouth shut or they’ll fill yo gut full of sweet sack meat (x3) Sarah G Chorus: Big Perm & Stevie K-I-N-G’s Stank ass rappas all up in their cheese Whatever happened to the real MC’s Stevie step up please - (No doubt. Yo!)
23.
My Crown (Feat. Poe Mack) Yea! Stevie D and Poe Mack You know you done fucked up now right You know you done fucked up You done put two of Roanoke’s best MC’s in the same muthafuckin’ place at the same muthafuckin’ time Wearin’ the same muthafuckin’ shirt Drinkin’ the same muthafuckin’ Nehi Grape Shit, motherfucker. This is a song!!!! Poe Mack Verse: Chorus: Fellas throw ya hands up Ladies pull ya pants down Ain’t nobody takin’ my kingdom, yo this is my crown It fits my head perfect, got my name engraved in it This ain’t no one size fits all crown, yo this is fitted Stevie D Verse: Hey yo I see these rappers hatin’ so blatant – I think they waitin’ For my crown to be taken – but they’re mistaken – I ain’t takin’ Off shit muthafucka – gobble dick muthafucka I show you fists like at the end of my pick you muthafucka Just kiddin’ and bullshittin’ – yo it’s Stevie D the sweetheart Carry in ya momma’s groceries and hug a retard Streetsmart, love organic food cause I eat smart Now let me segue on to the next part like I’m Paul Blart I started when I was twelve – recordin’ dirty songs on tape with the door shut Kids threw ‘em out the window like cigarette butts Took a couple years yo and perfected my sixteens Started Illbotz – the dopest fuckin’ group since Tag Team Now yall wild out like Nick Cannon when we up on the stage Cause we all the rage like Zach back with Audioslave And I’m goin nowhere! I’m in this biznitch for life Or at least til I’m 31 – oh shit! My birthday’s tonight! Fuck! Chorus:
24.
In 2012 In 2012, the world as we know it will be completely changed. The opposite of everything we know will take place And our biggest fears will come alive. Armageddon is near. Are you scared? I am. In fact, I just pissed on myself. It stings. But it’s my destiny to warn the world of what will happen in 2012. Planet Earth will be renamed Planet Microsoft. The world currency will be changed from dollar bills and coins to Pop-tarts – Brown Sugar Cinnamon. All doctors, lawyers, and psychiatrists will be poor. And the best paying job will be assistant crackwhore. All vaginas will be called math books And all boobies will be called mine. The only two things on TV will be ALF and infomercials for Flobies. Demons will rise from hell on giant pogo sticks to choke all Mennonites with slinkies. Ol’ Dirty Bastard will rise from the dead to steal all of Kanye West’s Grammys And give Big Perm gonorrhea. And Richard Simmons will become our first gay president in 2012. Normal people will go out every morning and knock on the doors of Jehovah’s Witnesses’ homes. Instead of “Hi, how are you?” people will greet each other with “Lick my asscrack.” Girls will not be able to win beauty contests unless they are hermaphrodites. Everyone will speak Klingon and people in England will finally brush their teeth. And R&B & Country will not suck in 2012. In 2012, Stevie D will get ass every day!

about

"Exceptional variety and quality keep all 24 tracks engaging." - Corbie Hill, Option Magazine

"The boys' best album to date, not to mention one of my new personal faves." - Z, Hipster, Please!

"I cannot count how many times i bust out in laughter listening to it, man. This is pure GENIUS!!" - John Hex Carter, Nerdy Show & Nerdapalooza Founder

"Roanoke’s rap comedy legends are back with what could be their greatest release to date." - Sean Poff, Scenic Recovery

"A hilarious return to form." - Tad Dickens, Roanoke Times

"If you’re a fan of intelligent silliness, this album is for you." - Chad Walker, Fandomania

"Even if it was just nerdy, Pudding is Delicious would still be an excellent Hip-Hop record, as Stevie D can open up like Roadblock’s .50 caliber and Samson puts together some great beats." - Michael Melchor, Count3rCu1ture.com

credits

released February 1, 2011

Produced by Poe Mack
Co-produced by Stevie D
Coco is Ice-T’s wife

Made in the year of our Lloyd 2011

All songs written quickly and performed poorly by Illbotz

Produced/ mixed by Poe Mack of Truenoke Music & Stevie D

Def artwork and fresh layout by Eli Bishop (www.flickr.com/photos/wiretapstudios)

Illbotz be:

Stevie D – Halfway decent mic skills, beats, kazoo, etch-a-sketch, power glove
Big Perm – Better than most mic skills, guitar, 40 dogs, Ke$ha tattoo
DJ Samson – Scratching/ mixing skills, beats, Frogger, glass eye

Dope beats provided by: Poe Mack (Track 23), Poe Mack & Stevie D (Track 12,22), Chris Prythm & Ill-it Beatz (Tracks 3,5,6,10,14,19)

Stupid, crazy thanks to: Brandy Davies, Poe Mack, Sarah G, Marshall Hicks, TJ Jessee, Alex Tyree (The Best Robot Ever!), Tad Dickens & The Roanoke Times, Jamie Booker & The Bazaar, Jason Garnett & Keri Sink & The Shadowbox, RoanokeRevolution.com, Sean Poff & ScenicRecovery.wordpress.com, Z & HipsterPlease.com, NerdcoreNow.com, Chris Prythm, Brian Dees, Greg & Press Press Merch, Sequoya, Joy In Red, Doug Cheatwood & The Bastards Of Fate, Joneski, Nancy & 2 Meteors, CBZL, Craptain Jack & The Schmees, Soul Elements, The ThoughtCriminals, Eternal Summers, Young Sinclairs, The Blind Photographers, The Situationist, Grass Monkey, Circus Practice, Chimney Sweep Records, Kent Moore, David Conner, Keith Brydie, Camellia Delk, Cory Greer, Lisa Davies, Mandy Melvin, Cristina Land, Ben Jones, Barry & Awful Arthur’s, Martin’s, The Village Grill, The Blues BBQ Co., Chuck D, LL Cool J, pudding, everyone who wears dinosaur hats at our shows, and most importantly PBR!!

www.facebook.com/illbotz
www.reverbnation.com/illbotz
www.myspace.com/illbotz
illbotz.bandcamp.com
www.youtube.com/stevied123

Email: Illbotz@gmail.com

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Illbotz Roanoke, Virginia

Illbotz are a comedy/ hip-hop/ acoustic group from Roanoke, VA who have been making music, touring, and telling terrible jokes since 2004. They've released 5 albums including their newest "Pudding Is Delicious." Illbotz are known for their high-energy and hilarious live shows. They have shared the stage with Slick Rick, Bubba Sparxxx, Captured! By Robots, and many more! Love them! ... more

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